What Your Girlfriend Really Thinks about the Super Bowl

O.M.G. the playoffs have officially ended and now its time for boobs, booze and football! How freaking exciting is that? I mean it’s going to be like 20-30 guys on a field at any given moment all fighting to the death over a ball; a ball. Of course theres rules too, you’re not allowed to intentionally hurt anyone (even though you have to tackle people to get the upper hand), be a sore loser, or do anything that could be deemed as anything other than family friendly (major key). Marking next Sunday in your calendar yet? Probably not if you ask your girlfriend or wife the same question. Here’s what us women really think about football.

I’m just going to take an educated guess here that your girlfriend isn’t really marking her calendar for anything in February besides Valentines day and fashion week but don’t let that deter you from your dream of being with someone that loves sports as much as you. We just simply don’t understand and don’t care to understand the game, most of us anyways. Here’s why football is stupid, at least in my humble opinion :


  1. Its like watching a pile up on the high way and you have to pick which wreck to keep your eyes on.



2. So you got in trouble for the pass interference (whatever that means) but not for the concussion. This game makes a lot of sense. 


3. ONE second = THREE hours in football (rough guesstimate)



4. So it seems as if #10 is the only one with some damn sense on the field since the others want to dress like its summer. I guess they missed the “rain or shine” memo on the game schedule.  


5. Wait…isn’t he the one that cheated like 3 years in a row?



6. Seriously?… Just give it to them



7. If your girlfriend asks “hey who’s #____ on the field” it’s because she’s also found an interest in football and in #____’s  ass in those tight leggings. 



8. Like OMG this is so sad.  Who died?



9. So Barcelona has a football team too but with totally different rules and they handle their balls way different. 



10. Finally! A man secure enough with his masculinity to wear pink.



11. Because it’s just so difficult to get a ball across a line?! And this is what they get paid millions for.



12. If your conversation goes a little something like “Hey hun you watching the Super Bowl with me?” and she says No. Just respond with “Guess you’ll miss Mother Monster’s performance then too.” Thank me later. Although I can’t guarantee she’ll watch the rest of the game. 


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